(BEFORE I GO INTO THE POST)
So check this out. Most people don’t read blog posts anymore… It’s just so much easier to watch a video, listen to a podcast, or passively engage in any one of many other mediums.
But I’m gonna be honest here, I still like the idea of having a blog! And I think it’s really cool when I get to explore my ideas by writing about them and sharing them with all of you.
So here’s my compromise. While I experiment with other platforms to find something that works for both of us, I’m going to continue writing here. But in the meantime, I’ll be experimenting with different writing formats to see if there’s something that’s both more engaging, and more importantly, easier to read.
This post in particular is going to be quite short. I’ve never seen a 2-minute blog post before, but I’d love to be the first to try it out, especially if it makes for a better reading experience for you. If it doesn’t, let me know though, because I don’t want to keep doing anything that doesn’t work.
But let’s put that all to the side for right now… There’s a big idea that’s been on my mind recently and I think it’s just waiting to be shared. So without further ado: Let’s go baby!
Just a heads up, I’m going to sound a little crazy at first saying this. But hear me out, I think this is a good idea.
I don’t think I’m the best friend I deserve.
When I think about KC, and the kind of the guy he is, there’s a lot I don’t know, even though I have to do EVERYTHING with him. I don’t know a lot of the things he likes to do, I don’t know his goals, I put him in some weird situations that he doesn’t always care about, and I can be pretty critical of him sometimes.
If I was saying those things about any other friend of mine, we could pretty easily see that I’m being a bad friend. Yet when I say those things about myself, it’s okay for some reason. In fact, I think most of us could say those things about ourselves.
So this brings up a big question: Why do we hold these standards for how we treat our friends but don’t seem to hold these standards for how we treat ourselves? Or even if we do hold these standards of ourselves, why are we okay with failing ourselves when we aren’t okay with failing our friends?
I think before I’m capable of being a good friend for anyone else, or ESPECIALLY of being somebody’s partner, I need to be capable of being my own friend first. It sounds simple, but I think that only once you’re capable of treating yourself right can you begin to know how to do that for other people as well.
It sounds simple, but I think that only once you’re capable of treating yourself right can you begin to know how to do that for other people as well.
We should be the best friend we deserve first, and once we’ve got that down try and be the best friend we feel someone else deserves. And once we’re capable of being the best friend someone else deserves, THEN we can be the partner we think someone else deserves.
In short, love yourself, then love your friends, and after all that, then love your partner. If you do it right, you’ll be in a place where they love you too.
So: Are you being the friend you deserve? Ask yourself these questions:
* Do I talk to myself in the same way that I would want to talk to my friends?
* How do I look at my own value vs how I value other people?
* Do I know myself? Do I know all the nuances of myself that a good friend would know about someone else?
* Do I do things myself enjoys, just like I try to do things my friends will enjoy?
I’ve always wondered when I will find a friend that’s just like me; When I will find a friend that just gets me and is a good friend to me. I think we all wonder that.
But as long as I’ve wondered, that person’s never seemed to come. And in fact the more I look for them, the harder it feels to find them. But I’ve also found that the more I just focus on loving myself, the more I attract good friends and get closer to finding that person.
Maybe it isn’t about finding that person at all. Maybe that best friend was here all along, and I somehow managed to ignore him this whole time. Maybe that best friend was me.
I’m excited to get to know him. And maybe you can get to know you too. While you’re getting to know them, tell them to come read this blog too.
Let’s go baby.